Unpublished Notes Of A Certified Stalker

03 Jul

So I found this post I wrote a while back and I thought it would be a great way to clean out the cobwebs on this blog. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

Oh well…I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

P.s I’m still a little confused if I actually wrote this…cos I can’t specifically remember writing it. *sigh

Anyway, enjoy!


Did you unfollow me on Twitter? I don’t want to believe you did. I want to believe it is the touch screen phone… I know it can be messy sometimes.

These were the words of the email I was typing. I was thinking of an anecdote to add before hitting send when I got a mention on Twitter and decided to check it out first, hoping it was you noticing and tweeting an apology like I have seen you do to a few but my heart actually skipped a beat when I saw your tweet or should I say your subtweet.

It was not okay that you unfollowed me. You also had to sub me to boot.

“If you notice I unfollowed you, do not mail me. It was not a mistake”
I just stared at the words. I am still trying to make sense of it. I thought we were good…really good together. Just a little while longer and people would get envious of our banter. I envisaged how people would DM to ask me how we got so close within a short period. I was expecting you would take the lead in the DM? I would do my best to match your level of formality or playfulness with every DM. I cautioned myself against abusing the DM privileges.
I took time to comment on every topic you raised. Google became my friend in a bid to sound as intelligent as you do. I went as far as your Twitter allowed me to check out your tweets. I researched on the topics that interested you and started tweeting along those lines. I found your Facebook and Linked-In accounts. I stopped myself from connecting so as not to spook you. But I read up on everything that interests you. I even started following the EPL because of you. I felt your pain when Arsenal lost against Manchester United. I tweeted at all the silly Man U fans on my TL who dared taunt Arsenal. I became your Voltron.

I subscribed to Techcabal, The Naked Convos, Techsuplex, and I have been tinkering with thoughts of following Mashable, Buffer and Techcrunch so I don’t feel so lost each time you go into tech-mode. I tried to create the right balance. It was not like I did not have my own interests, but I put yours above mine… always.  Your tweets showed that you were not a great fan of BBA or NHBi. I watched those shows on a low key because of you. I would follow NHBi tweets without commenting so that I do not mess up your TL.

So, after I endured all your interests you repay me with an unfollow?

True, I may have obtained your follow through devious means. I know that it may have been a little like blackmail when I copied the Reverends style of asking for a followback by tweeting that I am quite comfortable with people like you not following. But you did voluntarily send me your email didn’t you? Okay, so it was because I promised to send you an email containing an information you need for a blog post. God knows I tried to get the info. It just was not available. But I did mail just to check on you when I noticed you were away from Twitter for a few hours. Maybe I overdid it then.

I have read every single blog post you put up. Harvested every personal tweet I could find. I know your best music, best colour, I know what perfume you use now and the last two you tried. I was thinking in the lines of learning to use the new Twitter Custom Timeline just to ensure I didn’t miss anything you have an interest in.

Well, here’s the thing. I do not think I am going to unfollow you. I know you expect me to but I won’t. I am positive that someday you will realize your mistake and follow me back again.



Posted by on July 3, 2014 in General


Tags: , ,

6 responses to “Unpublished Notes Of A Certified Stalker

  1. highlandblue

    July 3, 2014 at 10:21 pm

    LOL you know you’re mad, abi? You won’t tell us who inspired this?

    • anagail

      July 3, 2014 at 10:30 pm

      Er… I can’t remember :p

      • highlandblue

        July 3, 2014 at 10:31 pm

        Heyyyyyyy nau you can liiiieeeeee

      • anagail

        July 3, 2014 at 10:32 pm

        This is fiction bruh…

  2. justmykke

    July 5, 2014 at 11:27 am

    Lovely story …hope u will get to check my site as well….though my stories r a bit x rated.

  3. Callings

    July 8, 2014 at 8:59 am

    ‘The Reverend’s style’. LOL


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