So in the spirit of sharing defining moments, I felt I should share some (and by some I mean one or two or three) embarassing moments that I have learnt from. Promise not to laugh. Like really cross your heart and yaddy yaddy yak yak
Caveat: I am ready to bathe naked to prove that none of these things happened to me.
So, I met this rather nice guy and you know how it is. I was beginning to think hanging out with him on a permanent basis would be cool. Well, we agreed to meet again and I must say I was excited.
The date came and I took time getting ready. I wore this cream coloured gown I really liked. And I waited for him to show up. As far as I was concerned, nothing was going to go wrong. He arrived on time to pick me and he had this very nice car with leather seats that matched my dress. He asked if I’d like to eat out and we were supposed to just hang out.
I was enjoying the music and the conversation so maybe that was why I missed the vital signs. At a point I felt like mild pain in my abdomen and I just shook it off there was no reason to cause alarm.
We arrived at the restaurant and he was like the perfect gentleman. He asked me to hold on while he comes round to open the door for me. So, I sat smiling stupidly to myself. I mean, he was not only intelligent, he was also a gentleman.
He held the door open and I stood. I still cannot explain why I looked down at the car seat. The red mark sent my heart racing. He saw it same time I did and I had to check my dress. Strike that, he had to check my dress.
You know what it feels like when you say ‘somebody shoot me’ and at that moment you really mean it? Yeah that!
Long story short, the red robot had struck. He tried to be nice about everything. How could he help…I just wanted to die 😥 I just got back in the car and he drove me home and I never agreed to go out with him again.
Good thing that came out of the episode was that I took interest in knowing when the red robot would strike again. Until then my believe was that the only people who bothered about such things were people who were sexually active and were scared of getting pregnant.
Well, that’s it. My not so embarrassing moment. The other one I remember happened when I was very very young, below 10 I think…a very er…shitty experience. Join me tomorrow 😛
And he kept a fixed look and kept it set to the point of embarrassment. Then the man of the true God gave way to weeping. – 2 Kings 8:11 NWT